Episode 8 – Launch Party

By Jaqueline King

Last week, on Generation Q…

1. Sophie and Finley banged nonstop.
2. Alice banged her ex in a car. Well, most of her body was in the car…
3. Bette finally got Pippa to agree to collaborate with her. Some of this collaboration occurred on a shiny glass floor.
4. Tess and Shane did tongue-kissing in the rain.
5. Finley was driving. While drunk.

Finley spent the night in jail and she stinks. She also needs to find money fast because she owes a shitload. Sophie tells her that the impound fee was almost a grand, and then Finley offers to split it with her.

I’m sorry…what?! Finley got behind the wheel drunk and she’s expecting Sophie to pay half of the impound fee on her vehicle?

Sophie says, no I mean, it’s not like we split the DUI.

I’m not understanding this situation at all. She’s offering to pay the impound money because Finley has to pay for the DUI? Of course Finley has to pay the DUI. It’s HER DUI.

Dani is trying to catch up with Bette, who is briskly walking towards becoming the most unlikable character of this season. Dani wants to ask Bette about Gigi, and also talk about that special lil thang she’s been working on for Bette, which she mentioned at the karaoke party.

Dani starts out by telling Bette how much she values her friendship. Bette smiles her mayoral smile. Then she starts to ask about Gigi but Bette interrupts her with a What the fuck?! which is of course a reaction to Dani’s last name plastered on her work building; not a reaction to Dani dating Gigi. Bette doesn’t give a shit about Gigi. We know this because of how she acts, and also because Bette shrieks I don’t give a shit about Gigi!!!

The ensuing conversation is a big hot mess. Dani spent lots and lots of the company’s ambiguously sourced blood money on gifting art gallery moola to Bette. Bette is disgusted by the impurity of the money’s source and more importantly, the big ugly sight of the Núñez name attached to black artists whose work seeks to start a revolution.

Bette ran an entire mayoral campaign with the Núñez name attached to it after Dani Núñez inexplicably quit her high-power job to be Bette’s overworked bitch. Also, Bette’s entire project already has a racist name attached to it: Zakarian.

But Bette insists that people are going to see the Núñez name and instantly think of “one thing”. You know what I think of when I see the Núñez name? I think…wow, that is a very common name. A lot of people are named Núñez.

Dani shows up at Gigi’s on some aggressive energy, says Fuck Bette Porter, and promptly sticks her tongue in Gigi’s mouth. I am highly supportive of this situation.

Gigi starts to go down on Dani, and Dani takes off her skirt. But then Dani grabs her and throws her down on the couch and starts to take off Gigi’s skirt. There’s a lot of head whipping, curls flying, and ecstatic moaning. I had to watch it 5 times. You know. For research.

That was a nice moment. Aaaaand now it’s over. The next scene is so painful I don’t even want to acknowledge it happened. Because honestly, what the fuck is going on?

Bette decided it was a good idea to use Pippa’s work as a bargaining chip to take a stand against…what, exactly? Núñez? Pippa understandably freaks out because this is the exact kind of thing she made Bette explicitly promise not to do. In fact, I thought that conversation was a little over-the-top. In what world would Bette chase this woman down to show her work only to set her up for rejection? Ha ha. I was wrong.

Pippa screams at Bette: you can’t show work like mine without big money attached to it! Pippa knows it. Bette knows it. I know it. Only because Bette and Pippa have discussed this exact concept at length. Pippa was initially hesitant to accept Bette’s offer to work with Zakarian because she didn’t want her name attached to an actual racist. Bette took every possible measure to seduce her into “selling out” by convincing her that she needed Zakarian’s money. And now Bette wants to turn away funding because of pharmaceutical investing?

Someone barges into Bette’s meeting to hand her a slip of paper that says the CAC is now pulling all Zakarian artists from the show. Pippa screams. Bette screams. I scream. I hate this so much.

Micah bursts into a psychiatrist’s office to yell at her for prescribing one of his clients hormone blockers. She tells him she’s a doctor and he needs to get out of her office. As she should.

It’s Alice’s big day and she’s serving us Effie Trinket realness. We have this insane pink / orange / white print and giant sleeves…and it’s also slightly asymmetrical? This dress initially makes me feel like I just got off a carnival ride and I’m about to toss a cotton candy lunch. But then I realize how challenging it is to look incredibly femme, incredibly queer, and incredibly expensive at the same time and now I don’t know how to feel.

Bette and Alice tease Shane about Tess.

Bette asks Shane if she’s “dipping her toes in the water”. Please tell me this is a euphemism for sex.

Alice panics when her editor / maybe-boyfriend enters the room and she confides in Bette that she hasn’t mentioned to Tommy boy that she shalala’d with her ex all over town.

Bette is in rare form tonight because she avoids saying anything judgy to Alice about her maybe-cheating. She says she will support Alice in her decision to tell Tom or not tell Tom. Yay Bette! And that’s the only yay Bette is getting from me in the foreseeable future.

Tom is here with his puppy eyes and his face looks 30% more naked? Did he shave his face? His head? Something changed.

Update: he shaved both.

He and Alice bond once again over those lobsters they murdered in the ocean that one time. Then Tom slips Alice a hotel key. He wants to do a lot of sex and he convinced the publisher to spring for a hotel room. Sorry, but my brain cannot stop trying to picture this conversation happening.

Hey, publisher, you know that celebrity author whose book you sent me to edit? Can you buy us a hotel room so we can do a lot of sex?

Say WHAT?!

I’m dying for context but there is none so moving on…

Finley and Tom have a secret handshake cuz they’re besties. This makes perfect sense to me.

Finley tells Alice and Tom she “caught a nasty dewey but she’s clawing her way back” which I think is a fun way to say she was arrested for drunk driving. Sophie doesn’t seem to think there needs to be a fun way to say “I was arrested for drunk driving!”

Dani is back in her clothes and on the phone with her dad over the fact that they are now in crisis mode over the CAC endowment. Gigi wraps her legs around Dani, and when Dani gets off the phone and briefs Gigi on the situation, Gigi starts asking some gently probing questions. Is Dani in crisis or is Dani’s dad in crisis? Does Dani ever say no to her Dad? These might be good questions…for a different time. Dani is under pressure right now and she kind of snaps at Gigi. It’s a bit soon to be snapping at Gigi, but I do understand where Dani is coming from in the heat of the moment. I just hope this doesn’t become a pattern because Gigi just got out of a Bette Porter situation and she doesn’t need to be treated like that.

Micah catches up to Dr Claudia after work to apologize for snapping at her about their client. He explains that he was in a situation similar to the client, and it was devastating to have a paediatrician suggest hormone blockers when he wasn’t in a place where he could start those without parental support (which he didn’t have). He offers Dr Claudia an apology dinner and then things get SUPER SPICY SUPER FAST.

She’s all, OO, dinner?? 😉
Can you cook?
Text me your address. I’ll see you later 😉

Okay, whoa. I’m so into this interaction and the way Dr Claudia takes charge of the scenario and goes from professional to sexy so fast.

Is Micah about to bang a doctor? I hope so. This is hot for me.

Dani has a meeting with her father and two colleagues. She defends her decision to attempt a directional change with the company’s image. Her next suggestion is to double the endowment and “earmark it for BIPOC artists based in LA”.

Then she completely goes off on her dad. She says she’s been cleaning up his messes “her whole fucking life” and then says she doesn’t want to take the stand to testify for her dad because people “really don’t want to hear what she thinks of him”. It seems like she’s coming off a little hot, but then again, I’ll admit I don’t feel like I have enough context to understand the situation. What illegal things has Dani’s dad done?

Shane gets off the phone with Tess and tells Bette that Tess is in Vegas, taking care of her mom. She seems disappointed. Earlier she told Bette and Alice that Tess was coming to the event, so clearly Tess blew her off. This is not baby mama behavior, but Shane is super into Tess so she’s gonna let it slide.

If the Tom-Alice storyline was supposed to step away from the biphobia / bi erasure present in the original show, they really fucking fumbled it here. Alice really tries to apologize to Tom for sleeping with Nat by mentioning that she hasn’t dated a man since her twenties. What does that have to do with anything?

The “sorry, had to cheat on you cuz I’m bi” trope is lightyears away from what I’d like to see on screen in terms of positive bisexual representation.

Tom calls Alice on her bullshit, and to her credit, Alice concedes. She didn’t sleep with Nat because she was “confused” or “didn’t know the rules”. She just fucked up and it was shitty of her to blame it on being bi. Do better!

I would be happy to see a bi character on the show that isn’t Alice. I’ll admit it. I just can’t picture this particular storyline going in an acceptable direction.

Tom gives a sweet speech for Alice even though she just told him she banged her ex. That’s nice.

Alice gives the world’s most perfect speech and reads the world’s most perfect excerpt from her Dana chapter. Bette and Shane are crying. I’m crying. Dumbly, I wish that this book actually existed so I could read it because who doesn’t love a book that can make you laugh and cry simultaneously? Alice is so funny even when she’s talking about the most heartbreaking moments imaginable.

Shane is going to go get Tess, which I guess means she’s going to the airport. Alice says she can have a flight ticket waiting for her. Didn’t Shane have a private jet a few episodes ago? What the fuck is going on?

Finley is acting like Finley, and that annoys Sophie now. Okay, maybe Finley is acting like a slightly on-edge version of Finley that is trying to make herself feel better about the fact that she just got a life-damaging citation. But it’s not helping that Sophie is clearly deeply pissed off and embarrassed of her. Finley drops a poorly-timed I love you like Alice loved Dana and Sophie just stares back at Finley like she has three eyes and asks if she’s drinking again. This scene makes my stomach turn. What the fuck is going on?

Finley tries to get Sophie to lighten up by saying we got unlucky, it could happen to anyone. Sophie says I don’t think it could. Finley isn’t taking this very seriously, but since when has Finley taken anything seriously? Also…where was Sophie’s code of ethics when she watched her girlfriend get behind the wheel after consuming multiple alcoholic beverages? I’m not saying it’s her fault, but someone who drinks and drives and gets a DUI is not that different from someone who drinks and drives and doesn’t get a DUI. The drinking and driving didn’t bother Sophie, but the DUI does.

I think we’re supposed to think Finley has a drinking problem. It’s hard to tell because everyone on the show is always drinking. This whole storyline would make more sense to me if there were a discernible difference between sober Finley and drinking Finley. Drinking Finley makes rash decisions and bad choices. Sober Finley crashed a wedding and made a love confession to a bride at the altar. What character development was I supposed to be seeing there?

I hate this episode. But wait! It gets worse!

Micah sets the kitchen on fire in the process of attempting to make dinner for Dr Claudia, which makes this the second time in 24 hours he has royally fucked up in her presence. Yet somehow this scenario magically invites more chemistry than he and Maribel could work up over the course of 7 episodes. Maribel who?! I want them to make babies!

Bette marches up to Malik and asks why he didn’t respond to her demand / threat with a counteroffer. Okay, what would a counteroffer even look like in this situation?

He says that in his experience, she means what she says.

Bette says, don’t weaponize my ambition.

If I’m forced to think about what that means my brain will literally implode.

Pippa is lurking nearby and overhears this conversation, which means she overhears Bette grovelling / pleading / admitting to her mistake. And of course, talking about how important Pippa’s work is.

Pippa approaches Bette, who gives a pretty humble speech about her legacy of revenge. Pippa hugs her and maybe all is forgiven?

I don’t like you anymore.

But do you like beef noodles?

Dani shows up at Gigi’s place of work. The two of them had made plans and the Chinese food that Dani ordered is now cold. Gigi says she just had to do work things.

Dani asks if Gigi is working late to avoid her. Gigi says she didn’t want Dani to snap at her again.

Dani wants Gigi to eat her beef noodles! Gigi thinks beef noodles aren’t a good apology! Dani thinks most things can be fixed with beef noodles!

Gigi says she’s not a fan of the whole “hot and cold” thing. I’m assuming she’s referring to the hot moment when Dani bust in mid-workday to rip all of Gigi’s clothes off and fuck her for the first time. And the cold moment when Dani got her clothes back on, started yelling at someone on the phone, snapped at Gigi, and then left. Yeah, that’s fair.

Dani explains that she tries to keep her dad separate from the rest of her life. When she was with Sophie, every decision she made felt like choosing between Sophie and her dad. So I guess her excuse is that she was a little triggered by Gigi asking questions about her dad?

Gigi can relate because her dad always got in between her and Nat. Gigi says she met Nat when she was so young, and her dad wanted what was best for her. I wonder if it was a situation like the one with Dani and Sophie where Dani’s dad wasn’t a big fan of Sophie…but maybe he knew that Sophie and Dani weren’t compatible? Or he was just being an asshole. Hard to say.

Dani credits Gigi for the way she stood up for herself in the meeting today.

Dani explains that everything is going to work out with the CAC because Bette backed off. She says she’s going to give Bette a couple days to cool off, but…she “won”. Gigi is all smiles and she starts kissing Dani. But Dani has beef noodles on her mind. She would like to remind Gigi that these beef noodles were $27.50.

And all is well with Gigi and Dani sooooo…that’s one win for the day.

Next up, I would like to see how Dani reacts when she finds out Gigi has kids. Just kidding, I’m sure this has come up at some point. It just…doesn’t come up very much. Is Dani gonna be a cool step dad?

Micah and Dr Claudia are on the couch. I know we just met, but I’m fully in love with Dr Claudia. She’s sexy, she’s fun, and she’s completely flirting with Micah. Micah is the realest and the sweetest and I want this for him. I want this for him so bad!

Micah and Maribel were so cute, but I don’t know how I’m going to get over how disrespectful Maribel was in the last episode. Micah is super honest and he doesn’t play games. As for Maribel, I can’t follow her intentions.

Also, did I mention that I’m feeling the chemistry in this scene?!?! Micah and Dr Claudia for life <3 I am a fan! I AM A FAN!!!

Fine, I guess I’ll tell you what happens next.

I’m big mad but Micah pulls away from kissing Dr Claudia to face the fact that he’s not over Maribel’s ass. He breaks this news in the clumsiest way and Dr Claudia storms out.


Why does this happen? WHY DOES THIS HAPPEN.

Micah picks up his phone to text Maribel, probably. He’s going to say, Hi, Maribel, I still love u, and she’s going to say, Leave me alone Micah, I have 10 other boyfriends.

Alice uses her hotel key to burst in on Tom, who is hard at work stuffing free hotel soaps into his suitcase. Relatable. Alice tells Tom that she likes him. Tom tells Alice that he’s old and his back hurts. He’s bald and his eyeballs don’t work like they used to. Relatable. Alice hurt his feelings a lot and he wants to eat a whole pizza.

Alice and Tom agree to order pizza and also look forward to free hotel lobby breakfast.

Maribel shows up at Micah’s house. He tells her he’s watched Love & Basketball six times and he loves her. Absolutely nothing has prepared me for this conversation. Nothing!!! The last time they saw each other, it was post-sex awkwardness. Now he’s telling her he loves her?!?! We’re supposed to follow this?!?! To make things worse, he follows this declaration with, I know you love me too.

He knows she loves him too?!?! What was his indication?! The constant roasts? The ghosting after sex? CAN SOMEBODY PLEASE EXPLAIN WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON HERE?!?!

Maribel should call 911 because this is an emergency. Micah is acting insane and he needs medical attention. Instead she kisses Micah’s lips and I can’t emphasize enough that I don’t know how we got here!!!

Speaking of people who should call 911…Tess has a stalker. She jumped on a plane, knocked on her hotel room door, and announced that she wanted to be Tess’s partner. Her name is Shane and she is formerly known as the #1 lesbian fuckboy in LA.

I’m holding my breath because this could go either way. Is this cute or is it crazy???

???

It’s cute! They’re making out! Tess wears sexy red lingerie alone in her hotel room and orders extra towels. What kind of night was she planning?

Shane kisses down Tess’s back and takes off her shirt. Tess kisses Shane’s face and takes Shane’s shirt off. TITTIES. FINALLY. I’ve been so deprived.

Shane and Tess get horizontal. I guess they’re partners now!

Finley unzips her pants and dips into Sophie’s bed, smiling after a long night of drinking alone at the bar after her girlfriend stormed off in a disapproving rage. Sophie is disgusted. Ugh, you’re drunk. She climbs out of bed.

Finley says she’s sorry. She thinks Sophie is mad she didn’t pay her back for the impounded car. Sophie says it’s not about that. She just doesn’t want to talk to Finley when she’s drunk. She just feels like she’s been babysitting Finley all day.

The last two episodes were so nice. I feel like we finally got back to that amazing chemistry that Finley and Sophie had in season 1. Finley stuck up for herself when Sophie accused her of being embarrassing. And then Sophie made up for it by serenading Finley with a Karaoke song. And then Finley stuck up for herself when Sophie accused Finley of being a big kid who can’t take care of herself. And then, I dunno, they just acted like a normal couple. Now we’re back to Sophie feeling like Finley can’t take care of herself and I’m lost.

Sophie says when Finley drinks, it’s like a light goes out and nobody is home. Finley doesn’t act like herself.

What’s the solution, here? Is Finley supposed to stop drinking? Is Sophie going to stop drinking? You can’t get in a relationship with someone one minute and ask them to start making big changes the next. That’s not how it works. You have to think about the person before you commit to them. And take responsibility for the fact that their choices are also your choices. Because you chose them.

I would like for Sophie to start taking some fucking responsibility for all the things that happen to and around her. And I would like for Finley to figure out who she is and what her boundaries are.

Bette and Pippa are naked in bed. Pippa says, have you considered that it’s possible to burn shit down and still leave something standing?

I assume Pippa is referring to their prior convo in which Bette apologized for wilding out and attempted to explain her legacy of revenge.

Bette says she wants to burn things down together with Pippa. The two of them are going to start the revolution, and walk together towards the sun. Torches in one hand. Their other hands? Joined. They will not sleep. They will not rest. Until everything is in flames.

Tess and Shane wake up together in their Vegas hotel and smile at each other with their shiny skin. They joke about telling HR about their relationship, which reminds me that Shane is Tess’s boss, which makes this relationship only slightly inappropriate. Tess gets on top of Shane and starts kissing her. Tess is hot. Have I mentioned Tess is hot?

Sophie wakes up alone and feels around for her girlfriend, and then remembers that she let her girlfriend wander out alone, drunk, into the dead of night. Sophie said she feels like a babysitter, but if she were a babysitter, she’d be fired.

Aaaaand the episode is over. Damn. That was…awful. I am looking forward to future episodes with less pain and sadness and more…boobs.

Yeah. Boobs.

See you next week after I somehow manage to write the episode 9 recap in between getting alcohol poisoning at Dinah Shore. Have a great week everyone! And remember, stay gay and say no to patchouli!

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