Disturbing Turn Of Events Number 1:
Last night I dreamt of Jenny! :-/
Yes, The Weird One infiltrated my slumber, and was caught up in the middle
of some strange dream plot about army commandos trying to free people held
hostage in a house next door to me. All the army commanders eventually sat
down with me for a meal (a la Apocalypse Now - very Heart Of
Darkness/Brando-esque shaved heads etc) and in the middle of it all sat
Jenny. With her short pixie cut hairdo. All demure and fragile, being hit
upon by army guy after army guy. As if that wasn't disturbing enough, I then
proceeded to make it my business to look after her, seeing she was ok and
getting everything she could possibly need. I believe the dream ended
shortly after I followed her into an adjoining room, cupped her face in my
hands and asked her gently if I could kiss her - unlike all the army guys
who hadn't bothered to ask and had just made a lunge for her anyway - and
she replied by saying I could do what I wished. However, I wanted to be sure
it was what SHE wanted too, so asked her earnestly again if I could kiss
her. She looked so fragile and beautiful and I could think of nothing but
what her sweet lips would taste like upon my own, and THEN all hell broke
loose behind us as the commandos started storming the beach/house next door
and I don't even remember if to kiss her in the end either! LOL! What ANY of
that meant, in a Freudian type way, WHO THE HELL KNOWS! - cause I sure
Disturbing Turn Of Events Number 2:
Alas, this is my last recap of Season 2.
*cue the sobbing and wailing of millions*
WHAT I shall do with my fortnights after today - I have no idea whatsoever!
GONE will be the joy of recounting the new eps to people.
GONE will be the joy of receiving fan mail from people all around the world
who have read and enjoyed my recaps.
And GONE will be the joy of watching the show every week. Oh, and of course,
seeing Hot Carmen smile.
*deep sad sigh*
Hollywood is a lucky biatch, being able to recap the Season 2 finale, but
even so, I'd just like to say it's been a privilege to write and serve the
viewers this season on
www.thelwordonline.com. Thanks must go to Oz for hiring me, and to
Slicey for, well, being Slicey ;-) Don't forget, if you check back to my
episode 10 recap, you'll find a handy glossary/character nickname reminder
if you aren't sure who is who or what I'm talking about! *weg*
Folks, it's been a blast! Hope you enjoy the recap, and with luck I'll be
back next Season to regale the exploits of Sex-On-Legs, DaAlice and Poor
Bette to you once again!
p.s. On the bright side, this time next year I'll be in my own new flat (we
get the keys 1st June!) with my lovely lovely girlfriend and writing my
recaps at my very own desk!!!! So, you're all invited to a Season 3 finale
party round mine THEN! ;-)
DON'T FORGET YOUR BOTTLE OF RED WINE FOLKS! :-D CHEERS!
~FADE UP ON~
<PREVIOUSLY ON THE L WORD.....>
*Kit gazing at a sleeping Melvin in his hospital bed Poor Bette telling Tina
Melvyn has advanced prostrate cancer & is refusing treatment. Tina telling
Sugar Mommy that she wants to see other people (i.e. BETTE). Jenny asking
Sex-On-Legs what she's gonna do about the Carmen situation. Alice fessing up
to Sex-On-Legs the she told Dana she loved her (Dana didn't say she loved
her back). Mark confronting Jenny and Jenny giving him a mouthful about what
he's done. Jenny daring Mark to stay and face the mess he's created. Jenny
stating she and Mark are NOT friends*
~FADE UP ON~
Sort of phantom-like heavy breathing, as Jenny gets out of her car under
what looks like a freeway. Oh, turns out it's:
LOS ANGELES, CALIFORNIA, PRESENT DAY
Hooray! No flashbacks this week!
She walks across the road and into a place called Howling Coyote that looks
from the outside like a bar or a club or something. The phantom heavy
breathing continues, hastening its' pace and is joined by some doleful
Yiddish type oboe music. Ok, considering Jenny's rape repressed-memory
episode from last week, I'm not thinking she's going into this club for a
happy cheery birthday party :-( Oh and btw, is it just me, or is Jenny
turning into a fair impression of a young Audrey Hepburn, circa Sabrina
(1954)/Funny Face (1957) etc?! Mind you, I don't recall Audrey having a
penchant for bright hooker-red fuck me stilettos and lipstick, as Jenny
does....I wonder, is the phantom heavy-breathing over this part supposed to
represent Jenny's escalating trepidation at entering this seedy place, cause
no matter what it's for, it's really getting on my nerves! Grrrr.....
"Hey Victor, she's here!" states a blonde seated at a table in the club
(whom I believe to be the butch domme from the last ep who shackled Jenny
down, thus causing her repressed memories of being raped to surface....)
Victor: "Yeah? *he looks Jenny up and down* So?"
Butch Domme: "Trust me, she's a VERY SICK girl......"
*cue Jenny breaking into a really scary sicko type grin*
~FADE UP ON~
"this is the way that we, way that we
So, I detested this theme song when Season 2 started, but I've grown to like
it over the weeks. However, if the cringe worthy opening title sequence
isn't changed by next season, I may go on strike and refuse to buy the
Season 2 DVD box set! Ilene, THE TITLE SEQUENCE SUCKS!!!! GET IT CHANGED!!!
~FADE UP ON~
Jenny, singing in Yiddish I believe, looking through a disturbing collection
of drawings of a baying crowd and a helpless little girl. This is intercut
with scenes of an actual crowd of baying men.
We'll see more of the latter later.......
On a Jewish/Yiddish sidenote, (and just cause I want to brag! *weg*) I'm off
tomorrow to London to Expo 05, where I shall be meeting (among others) Amber
Benson - Tara in Buffy - and Spock himself, Leonard Nimoy!!!!! Ooooh yes,
I'll be rubbing shoulders (and pointy ears!) with the stars tomorrow! And
now to my original point - did you know that the "Vulcan salute" Nimoy
created for "Star Trek" (right hand open with palm outward, fingers
separated between the middle and ring fingers, thumb extended) is in reality
a hand gesture used by a Rabbi (both hands with thumbs touching) during the
Hebraic benediction, which includes the phrase "Live long and prosper"? So
hows THAT for a kosher titbit folks! Who said watching lesbian tv never
taught you anything! ;-)
Annnnnnnnnnnnnnd now back to the program in hand........
Kit, seated, whilst all around her Poor Bette and a bunch of removal guys
are carrying in a hospital bed and equipment etc. Seems Poor Bette just had
to get her father OUT of the hospital and back home with her for his last
days. Kit points out that looking after their father is gonna be a HUGE
task, and is her sister really up to it etc Poor Bette insists she IS, and
says that Kit shouldn't write their father off so quickly, even though Kit
points out yet again that Melvyn is refusing treatment for his advanced
cancer. Poor Bette. Trying to be in control of everything again. She's even
trying to control how long her father can live, even though it's mostly in
her mind. Melvyn is dying - Kit KNOWS that - but in Bette's mind she can
prolong his life by moving him home with her and out of the hospital
environment etc. At the end of this scene the two are still discussing what
Bette is doing bringing Melvyn home now, and it turns out that she hadn't
even discussed doing so with Kit! As usual, Alpha Female Bette just steamed
ahead and did what SHE wanted and to hell with everyone else! True, this
season she HAS grown and matured, what with being separated from Tina etc
BUT deep inside her there must still be that streak of
anyone's-input'-ness that she's displayed so often before. I just know it'll
be her undoing if she's not careful.
Jenny, still sitting looking at the drawings as before in her room. Shane
comes in with a muffin and some coffee, which she informs Jenny is from
Mark, cause he asked her to bring it to her. They talk briefly about Mark's
attempts at redeeming himself, and then discuss rent. Jenny insists she'll
pay her own rent (HOW exactly? Audrey Hepburn look-alikes with HUGE issues
who are in DIRE need of SERIOUS therapy aren't exactly raking in the money
these days WITHOUT a job!)
A woman walking up to Bette's house. We know it's Bette's house she's going
to as Mark is doing some DIY on the house next door :-) Inside, Poor Bette
is taking down some arty lesbian art pictures (presumably her daddy wouldn't
approve....) and there's a knock at the door. Turns out the woman outside is
a nurse or carer or something to help Bette with Melvyn when he arrives.
Bette continues rearranging the lounge, placing a nice photo of herself and
Tina next to the hospital bed etc and proceeds to tell Nice Nurse Lady (who
assumed they had a baby, after stowing her bags in the nursery) that she
does/may have/will have a baby, when her estranged partner gives birth in a
little while. Ah the complicated family units we have these days ;-)
Gone are the days of Mom, Dad and 2.4 ankle biters....
Aint it cool tho ;-) Bette gets on the phone and asks her assistant to
courier a box of her father's family photos over.
Nice Nurse Lady explains the use of a steroid in Melvyn's treatment plan to
Poor Bette. Seemingly it helps with mental clarity 'towards the end'. Oh.
Basically it's going to get confusing and upsetting for Bette AND her father
in the days/weeks to come.
Grim times are chez Porter :-(
Tina and DaAlice arriving at The Planet. Ok, Dana is wearing an ALARMING
sleeveless tank top/jumper that looks as if it's been misplaced by a
reindeer herder in Lapland! In the 70's. On a bad BAD day. DON'T ANY OF
THESE WOMEN LOOK IN A MIRROR BEFORE THEY GO OUT IN THE MORNING!!!! Ooooh
look! There's Sugar Mommy holding hands with Lee Austin (the glass
mobile-making lesbian artist from previous eps) in full view of everyone.
*rolls eyes* Clearly Helena has taken Tina at her word from last week,
about wanting to see "other people", and has decided to flaunt just such a
tit-for-tat situation in front of Miss Kennard in her usual watering hole.
Gods, could Helena BE any more childish!?! Gees......Sugar Mommy
deliberately catches the attention of her 'other' current girlfriend and so
the three of them all turn round and stand there gawping at Helena and her
totally inappropriate behaviour with another woman. Except it is of course
totally appropriate, as Tina expressed as wish to not be exclusive. A
cringingly awkward moment ensues, as Lee notes how pregnant Tina is, then
mentions "is that Bette Porter's baby?", to which, Sugar Mommy EVER so
helpfully (for helpfully, read SMUGLY) adds, "Didn't she ask you out?!" to
Lee, causing everyone to wish the ground would just open up and swallow them
Tina, proving she's above such underhanded childish behaviour simply gives
them a forced smile, rebuffs Helena's offer of meeting up there later that
night (she's tired, wants a hot bath and her own company seemingly! Good for
you woman!) and motions DaAlice over to their table, to leave Sugar Mommy
and Lee alone in their hand holding icky ness. Once seated, Dana enquires of
the pregnant one, "SOOOO, you're OKAY with that, huh?" (meaning Helena
canoodling with Lee). Tina feigns innocence then simply says she's ok with
it. Alice, on the other hand - spying Lara approaching over Dana's shoulder
- states quickly that SHE would NOT be ok with it......Insecure much! ;-)
"I was wondering when I would see you in here......you haven't come in for
and with those words from the soup chef, and a look directed straight at the
tennis player, my favourite pair on tv are united, in some form again! YES
folks, Dana and Lara are on my screen at the same time, in the same room!
Dana looks utterly surprised (why wouldn't she be, no one's told her Lara
was working at The Planet yet!) and gladly obliges when Lara asks for a hug.
It's clear the two haven't met since they broke up last season. Lara
mentions something about planning lunch etc and Dana is about to ask how
come Lara works at The Planet (and no one's told her! The meanies! LOL!)
when Alice butts in, steering the conversation away from where Lara WORKS,
and towards who Lara is DATING. However, her plans are scupperd when
Lara reveals she's no longer seeing Gabby and then proceeds to tell Dana
she's so proud of her for coming out and in such a big way etc! Awww bless
:-) Oh it's so lovely seeing Dana and Lara talking again. They have such
great chemistry, and pauses in sentences are coupled with long looks between
them. No wonder Alice is all nervous and jealous! Lara is hot stuff! ;-)
(Methinks I could see a pert nipple/t shirt interface there when she walked
in too!......MMmmmmmmmm). Lara sees Kit has arrived and goes to leave the
group, but before she exits, she asks if her and Dana could have dinner.
Alice looks as if she could spit bricks right then and Dana goes to agree,
then hesitates and asks Alice's permission. This lets Lara in on the fact
that DaAlice are indeed dating ;-) Alice makes a show of saying it's fine,
but it's obvious she's hating every minute of this and would much rather
yank her girlfriend out of The Planet and the general vicinity of anything
remotely connected with Lara! It's then I notice Alice is wearing what
appears to be a diner waitress' uniform from the 50's/60's!
Good grief, lesbians sure do dress weird in L.A.! ;-) Lara then makes her
exit, Dana sits there "wow"ing at seeing her ex at The Planet and Alice
takes a deep breath and suddenly finds the menu FASCINATING.
Heh heh ;-)
Nice Nurse Lady informing Poor Bette about what meds she'll have to
administer to her father etc, when the front door opens and Melvyn is
wheeled into the house by paramedics. I think it's pretty darn marvellous
that Ossie Davies was even able to BE in the last episodes of season 2! He
couldn't have been a well man in real life at that time, and yet he must
have soldiered on and worked his acting commitments through like a true
professional. He'll be sadly missed.
"How are you feeling Daddy?" enquires Bette, but her father answers by
enquiring "WHO is this woman?" of the Nice Nurse Lady. Turns out Nice Nurse
Lady has a name! Shelley :-) Melvyn takes a look around at the bank of
assembled faces staring down at him and says,
"Am ~I~ on DISPLAY?"
which gets the paramedics moving to leave and the viewers chuckling at the
fact he's still cantankerous, considering he's a dying man. Melvyn lays on
the bed in his blue and black pj's, and seeing him like that reminds me of
my Grandfather in Scotland towards the end of his days when he was in a care
Anyway.....Bette stands there and makes plans to screen off her father for a
bit of privacy. She's doing it again - do you see? Making decisions
unilaterally! Could she not just ask her father what HE'D like round his bed
for a bit of privacy?! GEES! Deciding Japanese screens would be nice, she
asks Shelley Nurse to "pick some up at Ikea", and is dealt a metaphorical
slap in the face as the nurse gently replies, "maybe you could get YOUR
assistant to do that....." Ahhhh Poor Bette. Sometimes you forget that not
EVERYONE around you dances to your tune ;-)
And speaking of Ikea - it is evil and should be stopped! BUT on the other
hand, if you look on ebay, all the best value bits of second hand furniture
are Ikean, (I've found some great bargains for my flat!) so perhaps we
should halt plans for the eradication of that particular retail chain for
Shennys, where Mark is mending (?) the sink in the kitchen as Jenny gets
ready to go out somewhere. He offers to cover Jenny for her rent this month,
but his kindness is greeted with a, "FUCK YOU" and the conversation goes
M: "I DON'T expect that it would 'fix' everything...."
J: "You can buy me off, with money and good deeds, like I'm some kind of
M: "That's NOT what I meant...."
and then Jenny just walks out the door.......
Bette's boss (I forget his name) has come to pay his employee a house call.
She tells him once the week's over she should get back into a routine with
her father and be able to get back to work etc. Her boss comes across as
sympathetic, but mentions they need to have "structure" in place. Which
sounds to me as if it's a veiled way of saying, 'I know you have troubles at
home, but work is work!'. Hmmmm. He suggests a leave of absence to her,
which she doesn't seem to like very much, stating she's hired a nurse for
her father etc! Just then Nurse Shelley comes in and asks Bette to help her
turn Melvyn in bed. Bette's boss takes the opportunity to leave then,
and again mentions the leave of absence. Bette asks for a little time to
decide and he 'graciously' offers her the weekend to think it over.
Sugar Mommy and an unknown blonde looking at a menu. Looks like it's evening
at The Planet now. Unknown Blonde is sitting next to Sugar Mommy who's
next to Tina. Across from them, all coupley and draped over one another are
DaAlice. Sugar Mommy (ever the tactful bitch) asks DaAlice "Your chefs
name is Lara, yeah?" *cue Alice rolling eyes* and then asks the waitress to
ask Lara to make them a plate of bits and bobs to sample. Alice mumbles
"YOUR chef..." petulantly to Dana, and said tennis player just sucks in a
breath and holds it. Ahhhh Sapphic relationships, aint they just grand! LOL!
Unknown Blonde and Sugar Mommy flirt, RIGHT next to Tina, and quite rightly
she's not impressed.
Over from them, Dana is telling Alice she DOESN'T need to go out to dinner
with Lara etc but Alice reiterates that she said it was ok for her to go.
Even though it's CLEARLY not ok for her to go ;-) Tina sits there, staring
at Helena's back and sips her drink, while he girlfriend flirts madly with
Unknown Blonde, until she's had enough and gets up to leave, stating she
can't keep her eyes open and is off to bed. To her credit, Sugar Mommy does
enquire sincerely "are you ok?!" of Tina, and Tina replies:
"APART from having to pee like a horse....." (what, on all fours? In a
stable? The mind boggles! *weg*) "Helena, I'm tired. I just wanna go home
and be alone."
Sugar Mommy gets the message and answers tersely, "Fine! ENJOY being
alone....", and lets Tina practically get out the door, before she catches
up with her, gives her a hug and a kiss and apologises. Good grief,
underneath all that money, Sugar Mommy IS human after all ;-)
Poor Bette reading Twain to her Poor Father while he lays in bed. She goes
to turn Melvyn over (to prevent him getting bedsores I believe...) when from
behind her, Tina appears and offers to help.
Seems she wasn't as tired as she made out to Sugar Mommy, and had probably
just gotten fed up of her girlfriend's overt flirting with Unknown Blonde
etc, so decided to go somewhere where she'd BE needed and wanted. i.e.
As they are turning Melvyn he wakes and looks at Tina. She gently
reminds him who she is and tells him Kit will be there later etc Melvyn
wants to know HOW she knows Kit, and the pained expression on Bette's face
as she realises her father is becoming more confused and is obviously
getting WORSE, not BETTER is heartbreaking to watch. They leave Melvyn so
Bette can get him a glass of water and Tina can fix Bette's dinner (that
Kit's prepared for her sis) and, in the kitchen, Tina apologizes for being
selfish the other night to Bette. Bette simply accepts the apology and
says wearily "that's ok....", going to give her Dad the water she promised
him. She has the air of a defeated woman about her, and Tina looks on,
almost surprised that she didn't say more to her apology, then carries on
fixing dinner for her ex.
Bette and Tina sitting together by her fathers' side. Bette tells her that
she put her father in the lounge and not the nursery, just in case....(i.e.
just in case he died in there. NOT the best start in life for a new nursery,
eh folks :-/ )
Jennifer Beals is doing her usual excellent portrayal of hard emotions and
trails off then, as Bette gets choked up by it all, so leans back and into
the arms of Tina, leaning her head on the other woman's chest. It's such a
bittersweet shot, the two of them like that. Tina, comforting her ex as her
father lays so ill next to them. They are FINALLY back together again,
in some semblance of the loving, caring relationship they once had, except
we all know it's under such painful circumstances. Such a shame. Tina starts
stroking Bette's hair to comfort her, and the following conversation ensues:
B: "Never done this before..."
T: "I've never held you?"
B: "Not in front of my father...."
T: "He's asleep"
*cue Melvyn waking and seeing their caring embrace*
M: "Now thaaat's what I like to see.....PROMISE, take GOOD care of my girl?"
Tina looks startled for a moment, no doubt shocked that Melvyn is being so
open to them now. Then she looks at him and at a Bette who's smiling up at
her with love and says gently, "I PROMISE".
M: "And you, *meaning Bette* take good care of your mother too....*cue Bette
rolling her eyes, distressed that her father is once again being confused
and doesn't know the present day from the past etc* you hear me?! Maxine,
don't run away again! STAY with our little girl! I know I let you down
Maxine, I was WEAK, I didn't mean to!....."
Tina let's Bette gently go, as she goes to tend to her father who's becoming
more distraught in his own waning mind.
Bette looks so hurt and devastated, for so many reasons, and tries to
comfort her father as he trails off, pleading with his phantom wife "to stay
and look after my girls!".
The Planet, where Kit is busy serving her customers and DaAlice are talking
in a corner. Up comes Sex-On-Legs and says: "Hey, Carmen called me - is she
REALLY here?!" And I think for a second she means Carmen herself, but then
the stage lights up and we see it's the main act Carmen was talking about!
Everybody in the place rushes to the stage as Peaches starts her set. Now, I
must warn y'all here, that Peaches scares me witless! ;-) And that's all I
really have to say on the matter ;-) Everyone starts dancing to the bearded,
sunglass-wearing popstar-cum genderbending performance artist, as she belts
out as song that goes something like:
"Are, you, he, together? - come on baby let's go!
are, you, she, together? come on baby let's go!
I don't have to make the choice
I like girls and I like boys!"
Peaches catches the eye of Sex-On-Legs (who doesn't!) and beckons her up on
stage. However, in a surprising twist, Shane waves a 'no thanks' and
declines! Ooooh....So Peaches picks out a blonde and gets her up onstage
instead, getting rather close and comfortable with her as they dance. Btw,
Mark is there in the audience close by and seems to be enjoying himself ;-)
Carmen is there too, and she and Shane make eye contact and continue
dancing, separately, but eventually the eye contact turns to grins and it's
clear they are enjoying themselves immensely!
May I just say, it's SO damn nice to see Shane ENJOYING herself for a
change, instead of the tortured-soul routine we've gotten used to from Miss
McCutcheon! YAY! Long may it continue!
Poor Bette, sitting on the side of her ailing fathers bed, sighing, "I can't
face it.....I can't face it" (of Melvyn's impending demise) to Tina, who
steps forward and takes the other woman's face in her hands, looking down at
her with utter compassion. Bette breaks down and so Tina stands her up and
pulls her close.
Tina leading her into the bedroom, where Bette flops down on the bed, still
weeping. The brunette pulls off her top like it's a chore and Tina leans
down and kisses her sweetly. Looking up into her eyes, the exhausted Bette
"Can we just sleep?"
Tina replies gratefully, "Yes please...."
and so that's what they do.
Bette lays down, greeting the pillow like it was heaven itself. Tina lays
down in front of her, so the other woman spoons her. They are both fully
clothed (with Bette minus her top), and the spooner slips her arm around the
pregnant ones' waist, and it's one of the most heart-warming, lovely,
life-affirming images that I've seen during 2 series of this show. :-)
Presumably the next day, where Jenny enters the kitchen at Shenny's, as Mark
stands at the side, making cafeteria coffee.
Btw, on a sidenote, Jenny grabs a packet of cereal called 'Life'. Personally
I think it should be called 'Life SUCKS!' if SHE'S eatin it. *weg*
"Want some coffee?" says Camcorder Guy
Jenny answers by munching some dry cereal and saying nothing.
A shot from outside, looking through Bette's window, where she wakes and
stretches with Tina still asleep by her side.
She turns, and in profile to the camera, we see she realises it's another
day to face with a dying father to cope with.
i.e. NOT a fun day ahead.
Poor Bette, now dressed and coming to see how her father is doing in the
front room. She sees Kit is asleep next to her dad. Turns out Kit
arrived late the night before after work to see her father, but he was in
too much pain to talk so she just stayed by his side. Bette stands and looks
at Melvyn and thinks her father is giving up.
She mentions that Nice Nurse Shelley is coming over soon and is going to
give their dad a sponge bath.
"She most certainly is NOT!" says an awake Melvyn. Sly old bird ;-)
He adds that he's perfectly able to get to the bathroom, as long as his
girls help him, as he's capable of looking after himself still, and further
points out that it seems Bette ISN'T looking after herself, as she's wearing
the same clothes as yesterday.
"That's cause I've been looking after YOU Daddy..." says Bette sweetly.
Melvyn isn't having any of that though and berates his youngest girl about
the fact that looking after him is causing her work to suffer etc - he heard
her talking about a leave of obscene with her boss - and goes on to tell
both his daughters that he doesn't want their careers to suffer because of
him. While they both listen to their father talk, the shot of the two
sisters is framed beautifully - Kit in the foreground, Bette slightly behind
and forward - so the profile of the two, rapt at their fathers' words is a
minor gem of work, which the director should be very proud of IMHO. Melvyn
is getting into the swing of it now, and tells Kit she's mistaken if she
thinks Benjamin is gonna leave his wife and kids for her. Turns out Kit
doesn't want that anyway, as she'd "never do that to another man's wife."
Her father disagrees, stating:
"It's human nature to peruse ones' happiness, over someone else's' misery"
Kit starts to disagree, but the conversation is interrupted by Tina's
arrival into the room. She apologises, and Melvyn says in greeting,
Which causes all three women to snap their heads back at him like he's just
stated the Pope is Satan! LOL! Tina, takes this surprising yet lovely
turn of events calmly and replies, "Hello Melvyn.........it's good to see
that you're feeling better", and then she's off to the door as work calls.
Bette strolls with her, and they hold hands. Lovely :-) Melvyn watches them
go to the door, where they kiss, then off Tina goes. You can't tell if the
expression on his face is envy, contentment (that his daughter will have
someone when he's gone etc) or mild dislike. Pike whichever one you're
most comfortable with and go with that I'd say. For me, I choose
Him being helped on either side by his daughters, to slowly walk to the
bathroom. He wants his privacy, so they let him go in himself, then the
doorbell rings, so Bette goes to answer it. It's Nice Nurse Shelley! She
immediately wonders why Melvyn's bed is empty and Bette states he's done
fine and is in the bathroom, when, of course, we hear the inevitable THUMP!
from said room, meaning he's collapsed! Both women rush off to help and find
him prone on the floor, demanding "NO hospital! NO MORE HOSPITAL!", and
Bette bolts from the room.
Shenny's, where Mark is reading a paper, Jenny is reading a book and eating
her 'Life' and Shane is doing the coffee thing. Sex-On-Legs enquires where
Jenny was last night, cause she missed Peaches performance. Jenny just
shrugs and eats her 'Life'. Just then Bette bursts in saying she needs their
help! All three of them rush off behind her.
Everyone, except Jenny, carrying Melvyn slowly back to his bed, from where
he fell in the bathroom. Nice Nurse Shelley gives everyone clear
instructions. Jenny looks on concerned.
A pair of GORGEOUS legs getting shaved in the shower. The legs belong to
Dana. Mmmmmm ;-) In comes Alice and asks her why she's shaving them.
"Cause there's hair on em?" replies Dana jokingly.
"Why, is Lara gonna feel them or something?" replies Alice sarcastically.
Dana just gives her a 'don't be stupid' look.
"What! It's a legitimate question!" says Alice
Jealousy, thy name be Pieszecki.
Shane and Mark walking along a busy street. He's reading the back of a tin
can and she's on the phone to Alice, saying she should pick up wine and
flowers and meet her over at Bette's. Turns out Shane and Mark are picking
stuff up for Melvyn to help Bette. Bless 'em :-)
Shane: "Poor Bette" (Hey! No fair! That's my line! *g*)
Mark (still reading the can label): " 'Poor Bette'? man.... Poor Melvyn!
Look at this shit! It's liquid food!"
Shane: "It's cycle of life - you wind up eatin baby food and you're back in
Mark gets a text message on his mobile phone and Sex-On-Legs wants to know
who it's from. Turns out it's from Lola - the blonde who got up on stage
M: "she was drunk"
S: "shit, if she was drunk, d'ya think she'd text message ME?!"
M: "Shut the fuck up..."
S: "I'll text message HER!"
this part of the scene between the two walking along the road is played like
a couple of teenage boys, having a laugh about a girl. It's funny and sweet
and cute and a nice injection of comedy between all the doleful business of
Melvyn's last days.
Bette, at home, on the phone, as DaAlice arrive, bearing a huge bunch of
sunflowers. Nice choice girls! Brighten the place up a bit :-) Seems Bette
is trying to hire a second nurse for her father. Alice hears that and looks
concerned as she sees to the flowers.
Bette, Mark, Shane, DaAlice sitting around on the back porch, talking about
S: "My dad? Invisible"
D: "Dependably supportive"
M: "ONE word" (i.e. everyone has to describe their dad's in just ONE word)
D: "DependABLE" ;-)
A: "Distant" (DaAlice share a compassionate look at that remark)
M: "Bette, what about you?"
*Bette looks up, and seems haggard and drawn*
B: "what about me what?"
S: "Describe your dad, one word"
Touché. Poor Bette.
Bette feeding water to her father through an eyedropper pipette. Shane comes
in and says maybe they should all go, let her be etc Bette wearily agrees,
and thanks everyone. Shane tells her to call if she needs anything and they
all say bye and take their leave. Bette carries on feeding her dad tiny
amounts of the water.
DaAlice pulling up to Lara's apartment block in cool new Mini. Alice reminds
her Jenny wants them somewhere at 10, but neither of them know for what.
Hmmmm....I can guess........ Dana is about to go, but checks Alice is ok.
Alice says she is, but we all know she isn't.
Bette, looking through her Dad's things which she had couriered over
earlier. She pulls out photos in frames from a box, one by one, reminiscing
about each photo with her father. She pulls out a shell from Acapulco then a
watercolour her mother did, and puts it across from the bed so her father
can see it. It's a sweet/sad scene between a daughter and her dying father,
remembering old times.
Dana and Lara having dinner. YES!
They're discussing the 'food adventures' they used to go on to different
places, and Dana says she misses that.
Lara says about a new place she knows of she's love to try, but Dana says
she "shouldn't" (accept the implied invitation to come along with her). Lara
guesses why, picking training as a reason. Dana says, yes, then no, and Lara
guesses the real reason she shouldn't come along. i.e. Alice. "Lara..."
Alice says in a warning tone, not wanting her to step over the friendship
boundary. "Dana...." she replies, in a sexy voice, "I'm JUST talking about
dinner...." Dana comes back with "No. THIS is a dinner. What you're talking
about is a SECOND dinner....." The two are looking into each others'
eyes, smiling knowingly and it's all very sultry and great and then we pan
down to Dana's bag hanging on her chair and see her mobile phone sticking
out of it, flashing and vibrating madly.
NO NO!!!!!!!! NO CUT TO!!!!!!!!!!!! I want STAYS ON! NOT cut to!!!!!! I want
more Dana/Lara having sexy dinner and flirting about second dates!!!!! DAMN
YOU DIRECTOR PERSON!!!!!!!!!! *grumbles*
Alice, who's the one ringing Dana's phone. She's outside the club where
Jenny told them to come that evening. Carmen sees her and shouts, waving
high, but rushes on in, as it's getting busy there. Alice, still on the
phone, leaves a message for Dana to come a little earlier, as it IS getting
very busy there! But you and I both know she's just calling to check up on
Dana and make sure she's not doing the horizontal Mambo with a certain chef
;-) ;-) ;-) Alice is pissed off she couldn't get through to her girlfriend
and had to leave a message!
Hot Carmen, struggling her way through the crowd in the club. The
crowd is ALL men btw. Big, burly, hairy, beefy men, who are all there
whooping and hollering at a woman who is near naked and stripping on stage
at that moment. Personally, I'm thinking Jenny hasn't invited them there for
a small, quiet bar mitzvah :-/ Hot Carmen spies Shane and makes a beeline
C: *sarcastically* "Nice place!"
S: *sarcastically* "Oh yeah!"
Just then Miss Stripper takes off her bikini top to reveal a pair of the
most surgically enhances tits I've EVER seen. If they are natural, I'm a
S: "Did Jenny invite you?!"
C: "Yeah, have you seen her?"
C: "This just doesn't feel right, I'm gonna go look for her...."
Pssst! Carmen! I'd try looking in the general vicinity of THE STAGE luv! ;-)
Miss Stripper is still doing her thang, and the guys next to the stage are
banging on it, making general blokey noises of encouragement and acting LIKE
a monkey's uncle. Men can be just SO refined sometimes, can't they
Sex-On-Legs looks through the crowd and sees Hot Carmen having an irate
altercation with a drunk guy, so rushes off to her rescue like a Dyke in
Shining Armour! YAY! Once she's pulled her away from the near-fight she's
having, they stand there getting jostled by the crowd, with Hot Carmen being
all pissed off at the guys, and Sex-On-Legs finding it highly amusing. This
causes Hot Carmen to ALSO find it highly amusing, and they both end up
having a giggle. Mid-smile, Shane leans over and shouts to the other woman,
"You wanna go out some time?" Carmen, unsurprisingly, isn't sure she heard
her right and says, "WHAT?!" So Shane repeats her question, and Carmen just
stands there, looking surprised. Then some bikers/big guys walk past and get
in the way of the great scene and I nearly fling my computer out the window
DAMN YOU DIRECTOR AND YOUR CUTS!!!!!
Bette reading to her father again. Kit is sitting next to her and asks her
what she's reading. Bette says it's her father's favourite poem, and didn't
he ever read it to Kit when she was little. Kit says no, and is sorta glad,
cause, as she says, "well thank god, cause that's one dull-ass poem!"
Causing both women a moment of levity as they continue their vigil.
Melvyn rouses slightly then, moaning "Momma!......Momma!" and the women try
to calm him, with Kit eventually starting to singing Rusty Old Halo by Bob
Merrill. Bette joins in too as they quietly sing:
"rusty old halo, skinny white clouds,
Some second hand wings, full of patches,
Rusty old halo, skinny white cloud,
Robe so woolly it scratches
I know a man, rich as a king,
Still he just won't give his neighbor a thing,
His day will come, I'll make a bet,
He'll get to Heaven and here's what he'll get;
rusty old halo, skinny white clouds,
Some second hand wings, full of patches,
Rusty old halo, skinny white cloud,
Robe so woolly it scratches"
And with the last chorus, Kit's voice falters and breaks. Her sister looks
on and comforts her, knowing the pain she shares.
~CUT BACK TO~
The strip club, where Miss Stripper finishes up her 'act' to the baying
crowd. Nice work if you can get it. NOT. On comes the host and introduces
the next act, who's new. It's "Miss Yeshiva Girl!!!!!!" (Btw, Yeshiva means
a religious school in Jewish. So, basically it's "Miss Schoolgirl!" Blech!)
The crowd go wild, baying for more, and off to the side of the stage, Jenny
is sitting. Eventually she throws a pink ladies shoe onstage. The crowd bay
still bay for more.
Shane, standing watching, somewhat bemused at this latest new act. Dana
arrives, stating to Shane, "Hey, I feel like I'm in hell! What is this
place?!" Shane replies cutely, "Jenny". I'd imagine that INSIDE Jenny's head
is some sort of hell, sure. Dana wonders where Alice is, and Shane says she
went to look for Dana!
Alice's place, where she's calling Dana's name and searching the rooms.
Opening the bedroom door and finding no Dana there, she flops face down on
the bed, miserable, cause no doubt in HER mind, Dana is still with Lara,
doing way more than discussing recipes, if you catch my drift ;-)
~CUT BACK TO~
Miss Yeshiva Girl's 'act'. Which is going like a bomb! (p.s. That's sarcasm)
Jenny's still sitting offstage, and throws on the other shoe, then a pink
dress, as the Jewish music plays. THEN she finally steps out onstage. Except
she's dressed in jeans and sleeveless black t shirt! (Personally, I'm
thinking Miss Stripper at the start of this was better than her! And that's
SAYING something!) Jenny slowly walks around the stage, looking at the
baying men in the crowd - sometimes looking pensive, sometimes wild and
manic eyes like she's gonna do something insane at any moment!
Shane, who sees it's Jenny up there, stating, "what the fuck is she
~CUT BACK TO~
Miss Yeshiva, still pacing slowly, as the crowd starts to boo instead of
cheer. Then she slowly takes off her t-shirt, and the rest of her clothes,
as the crowd's noise fades out slightly and her own voice, (again, singing
the Yiddish words at the beginning of the show, when she was looking through
those drawings) begins, adding a surreal and really rather icky 'innocent'
element to an otherwise totally adult situation. Finally she pulls down her
jeans and panties and stands there like a gymnast at the end of her routine
with arms out wide and high, wide eyed, almost daring the men to look at
her, totally naked. The camera shot then changes to a more distance aspect
and we see that Mia IS actually full frontal naked! Blimey guv'ner!
The crowd goes mental, cheering and whooping their joy. Y'know, I've said it
before and I'll say it again - men can sometimes be really rather sad ;-)
Dana, back at Alice's and entering their bedroom, where she finds Alice
laying on the bed. She comes over and sits by her girlfriend asking,
concerned, "Al? Alice, what happened?" Alice rolls over and says she was
calling and calling Dana's cell phone and she didn't answer. Dana states she
was there, and wondered where ALICE was! (But I think Alice meant earlier in
the evening and Dana is being evasive here....)
Alice: "I thought I lost you"
Dana: "I'm right here.....*moves a strand of hair off Alice's forehead
tenderly*.........I'm right here......"
Next day, and Camcorder Guy is making pancakes. Ooooh, I'll have mine with
maple syrup and double cream please my good man! And make it snappy! (I
don't ever eat breakfast, but, for pancakes and maple syrup, I may make an
"That smells good" says Jenny.
"Thanks" replies Mark.
"May I have one?" says Jenny.
"Of course" replies a pleasantly surprised Mark.
It's progress I guess......... :-) And definitely better than being
summarily ignored, that's for sure!
Tina, naked and asleep in bed.
Bette, humming to herself while she's busy in the kitchen.
Melvyn, moaning in pain in the lounge. Every breath is a moan, but he
manages to turn his head slightly to the side and look at the photos his
daughter has placed there. His moans cease.
~CUT BACK TO~
Bette, who suddenly stops humming, and notices the silence. She calls out
"Daddy?" softly, and goes over to where Melvyn lays, and as she gets closer
she calls out frantically for her sister. Kit rushes in and they both fall
to their knees beside their father, as Bette still tries to rouse him with
her cries of "Daddy!"
Melvyn has passed.
We hear the cries of Kit and plaintive Japanese flutes as the episode fades
out with the legend: 'Dedicated to the memory of Ossie Davies'. Followed by
the end credits, still with Japanese flute over them.
~Next time, on The L Word~
It's the season 2 finale!!!!
There's complications with the birth of Tina and Bette's baby! Oh no!
There's trouble between Dana and Alice! Oh my!
There's heat between Shane and Carmen! Oh yes!
and a whole lot more besides!
If you miss it, you're a ninny of the highest order! ;-)
p.s. sorry for the lateness in posting this recap folks! Came back from my
holidays with a terrible head cold which laid me low, THEN I've had untold
comings and goings due to the fact that I've just closed the deal on renting
my first ever place (yippee! with my girlfriend too!) AND to top it all,
yesterday i spent the whole day in London, meeting the stars of sci-fi
movies and tv! I just haven't had as much time as I usually do! Sorry! If
you want to blame someone/thing, blame (in this order:) germs, the pressures
of being a grown-up, Otho from Beetlejuice, Dr Janet Frazier from Stargate
SG1(she told me over and over again she loves me y'know!!!), Leonard Nimoy,
Kevin Sorbo and MOST of all, Amber Benson (Tara from Buffy) and her
mother!!!!!!!! For yes, they are all guilty of my tardiness!
Until next year, farewell and may the Lesbian Force be with you!
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