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:: L E T S  G E T  T H I S  P A R T Y  S T A R T E D ::

#5.04 Recap Blog by Riese



Dress You Up in My Love: Back at the McCutcheon-Schecter-Sweeny's, Shane's helping a petulant Jenny decide what to wear for the party. I'm 95% sure that Shane's wearing a see-through white turtleneck, but I'll let it go 'cause this scene feels so honest and cute -- speaks truly to the experience of two close friends who're both gay and attractive but haven't fucked yet. Whatever that's like for you people with self control. Jenny's bossing Adele around like whoa -- shooting Adele down when she attempts to assert that Jenny must attend the party regardless of how she feels about Nikki's casting -- an event which Jenny's informed of via William's card, which comes w/William's gift of an expensive watch. Adele's vacillating between spineless and homo sapien. Shane's blithely amused by the whole thing.

Jenny: Oh my God! Look at this! [looking at her new watch] Oh my G-d this is so expensive I could buy a house ... in Cambodia with this watch!
And then ...

Shane: [casually lusty] I want you to come tonight.
Jenny: [petulant] Why?
Shane: [genuine] I beg you as a friend and as a roommate.
Jenny: [wanting to talk about how much she's wanted] Why? Why?
Shane: [still genuine] Because I love you and I want to hang out with you. [looks lustfully at Jenny's hot bod]
Jenny: [coy, flirtatious] Why are you looking at me like that? ... [likes it] Stop staring. [grabs her tit, laughs] Shane you need to get laid!

The sexual tension between Shane and Jenny could set the room on fire. Alex and I are on the edge of the fluffy bed with anticipation, thinking that Jenny and Shane are possibly about to get it on. No dice.

Haviland: When did Jenny get boobs? She's like, a woman now, she looks great.
Riese: Being in a lesbian teevee show is like being in a lesbian relationship, you just let the weight pile on. [bada-bing!] Get it?
Alex: I get it.
Riese: She does look hotter now though I love her womanhood. She's way hotter than she was when she was poking around for a piece of toast.

Scenes From This Week: Then we've got two quick scenes. First, Kit goes to the gun range 'cause she's an American and we've got a right to bear arms. She's like, next time I get robbed, I'm just gonna pull a gun on his ass, and then I'm gonna shoot him, and then, because I'm an African-American woman in the allegedly (read: totally not at all) "fair trial"-granting glorious democracy of America and therefore a player in its fucked up legal system -- and because I'm an alcoholic with an out lesbian sister and we've both done time in the clinker before- I'll probs get thrown into jail forevs and evs unfairly and unjustly and never see my gun or Tinkerbell again. Meanwhile, rich British Helena can galavant around Europe, looking Foxy. Oh right. Here Kit is with the gun, good call Kit, damn the man:

Then another brief scene -- Alice and Tasha arrive at the Haunted Mansion, ready for the secret Hollywood mafia party:


What Would Brian Kinney Do?: OMG it's the opening of the new lesbian bar! Lesbian bars've always been super-profitable 'cause lesbians hate being at home and always wanna go out! These women are really onto something! They remind us of a lot of party promoters we know in the city, like SheScape! All the hottest girls in the coolest fashions are lining up to taste the magic and hopefully also the pussy! Kit tells the clipboard Nazi that she's Kit, from The Planet, and the woman's like "what planet, weirdo, we don't even serve coffee." No actually um, they say she's not on the list, so Bette wants to leave, which's also totally what I'd do. I'd be like, let's bust this popstand pronto, good excuse, no party for me, let's go home and cuddle. They get let in after all. Game on.

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