Tonight we went to the Premiere Party for the Info-mercial for
"OurChart.com" (which I mentioned I was intensely excited about already,
starring actresses Leisha Hailey, Mia Kirshner and Rachel Shelly. We were
confused that the infomercial seemed to suggest it was more of a forum to
organize the notches on one's belt than for lesbians to honestly network
with one another. I'm going to be optimistic that it's really about the
latter, because we shot some great pics of ourselves tonight that would be
really good on our OurChart page. I can't wait. Really, I can't, I've been
checking it about every ten seconds.
Sorry. I just had to mention that. I think it's a good thing to say. And
bang some furniture while you're at it.
Also, they screened these little clips from "The L Word," which is supposed
to be about The Way That We Live. I know that because they didn't change the
Our goal at the party was to get photographed for GoNYC Magazine or for
Curve, and within 30 seconds of our entourage's arrival, dressed in red, as
we pre-planned, we were totally photographed. The girl who photographed us
had really nice breasts.
I admit this event did make me very emotional and happy, just to see all of
these gay women and allies in the same room with characters they could look
to and cheer for and feel for and lust after, that there is a forum for
these stories, even if they are stories as poorly told as 90210 told the
stories of teenagers in high school. It's still great, to be in that room,
and to feel that energy. Precious Moments, y'all.
There were a lot of cute girls there, though most of them were my friends or
they had girlfriends or both. Anyhow going to lesbian events always makes me
feel super gay (side note: seeing "Naked Boys Singing" also made me feel
super gay), so we'll start out this show at a Kinsey 6.
"This is how much I love you guys. I'm like, rolling my eyes already."
-Heather, who so gamely came over for the post-party viewing of the
10pm episode although the show, as it stands, is not necessarily her
Lesbian Squabble #1: Can You Hear Me Now?
In the Ring: Tina V. Jenny, Alice, Helena, Max and Kit.
Content/Result: The Gals want Bette to know that no one can take her
baby away from her, so they have all gathered round to leave her a voice
mail telling her to come home. This will for sure work without a doubt. Tina
wants the Gals to know that "if she's not in L.A by the time I get back, I
will call the police and she will NEVER see Angelica again." We all know
Tina will win, but the real winner is Alice, because when Tina busts in and
rips out her waterfall (not the kind of waterfalls with dead mirages in
them, the other kind) of hatred, Alice is like "Bette, now she's definitely
not gonna come home" since Tina left that little Moment of Hate on the
Intervention Voice Mail.
"Look at their cool luggage!"
Shane Wins the Wet T-Shirt Contest
This is when Shane comes out of the sea because she used to be a Mermaid,
but then Ursula gave her feet because floating around you don't get too far,
legs are required for jumping, dancing, and walking around on on those,
what's that word again? FEEET
Lesbian Squabble #2: Last Night a DJ Saved my Life
In the Ring: Max and Jenny
Content/Result: Max totally loses. Jenny says she doesn't forgive
Shane for leaving Carmen, especially cause Alice spent all that time
planning the wedding and Helena spent a "small fortune" on it (and Jenny
managed to get laid by a cute French girl, but whatevs), but Max said he
would forgive Shane and Jenny should too. Why? Why is not a good question to
ask when it comes to Max. Because Max is stupid.
Jenny: I do support your transition. We just don't go together
anymore. Because you identify as a straight man. And there's the mismatch
because you want me to be a straight girlfriend to your straight guy. And I
identify as a lesbian who wants to fuck girls. And you're not a girl.
Angus looks really good here. I want his stylist.
And his body.
These Boots Were Made for Walking
This is a conversation that Haviland and I have all the time except that you
should sub "14,000 lace-ups" for "$129 Yanuk Jeans" or "$8.99 lip gloss"
Helena: I can't even buy a pair of shoes for 3,500 dollars!
Alice: Not if you're talking about 14,000 handmade in Barcelona